Thanksgiving is arguably the ultimate endurance sport of the parenting world. Between the coordinated chaos of managing a hot kitchen, wrangling sugar-fueled children, and navigating the delicate dynamics of extended family, it is a day that tests the mettle of even the most organized households. For retired NFL star Jason Kelce, however, the strategy for surviving “Turkey Day” involves a play that many partners might find hilariously—and perhaps infuriatingly—familiar: the tactical retreat.

In a recent episode of his chart-topping podcast “New Heights,” co-hosted with his brother, Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce, Jason offered a rare and unfiltered glimpse into the reality of the Kelce household during the holidays. With the trademark self-deprecating humor that has endeared him to millions of fans beyond the gridiron, Jason made a confession that has sparked laughter and nodding heads across social media. He frankly admitted that when the pressure is on, he turns into a “completely useless” partner, leaving his wife, Kylie Kelce, to shoulder the heavy lifting.

The “Useless” Hour: A Strategic Exit

The revelation came as the brothers discussed their upcoming plans for the holiday. Jason, who is preparing to host a full house—including former NFL tackle Andrew Whitworth and his family—painted a picture of impending bedlam. With his own four daughters (Wyatt, Elliotte, Bennett, and baby lay Finley) and the Whitworth clan descending on their home, the noise levels are guaranteed to be deafening.

“We have four kids, so I’m going to have to be wrestling these kids,” Jason told Travis, acknowledging the physical toll of the day. Travis, ever the instigator, joked that Jason should “get on all fours” and just start wrestling to wear the children down.

But despite this initial claim of being on dad duty, Jason quickly pivoted to the truth of his Thanksgiving routine. He revealed that while the kitchen is a war zone of preparation, he is nowhere to be found.

“I’m just a huge inconvenience on Thanksgiving,” Jason stated bluntly. “Because Kylie and her mom are making everything, literally. And instead of just like, watching the kids, I go next door and fry a turkey with [my dad] Ed.”

The admission is striking in its honesty. Jason is fully aware that his presence—or rather, his absence—creates a deficit in the household labor. While Kylie and her mother, Lisa, are juggling the monumental task of preparing a feast for a crowd while simultaneously keeping four young children alive and entertained, Jason is enjoying a peaceful hour of male bonding over a vat of hot oil.

“So for an hour of the day, I’m just completely useless,” he continued, laughing at his own audacity.

The “Unnecessary” Turkey

What makes the confession even funnier, and perhaps more aggravating for those who empathize with Kylie, is the justification for this escape act. Is the fried turkey a critical component of the meal? Is it the centerpiece that pulls the entire menu together? According to Jason, absolutely not.

He admitted that the turkey he fries with his father is completely superfluous. “We’re making an extra turkey that we don’t need,” he told Travis.

The absurdity of the situation highlights a classic holiday trope: the “busy work” that allows one person to feel productive while avoiding the actual, stressful work that needs to be done. By committing to frying a turkey—a task that requires standing outside, monitoring a thermometer, and drinking a beverage, far away from crying toddlers and steaming pots of mashed potatoes—Jason has crafted the perfect alibi. He isn’t “hiding,” technically; he is “cooking.” But as he freely admits, he is cooking something that nobody asked for, simply to avoid the alternative of childcare duty.

The Chaos of Four Kids Under Seven

To understand the weight of Jason’s abandonment, one must consider the reality of the Kelce household demographics. Jason and Kylie share four daughters, all under the age of seven. The youngest, Finley, is merely seven months old. Anyone who has attempted to host a holiday dinner with a teething infant and three high-energy siblings knows that “watching the kids” is not a passive activity. It is an active, high-stakes job that requires constant vigilance.

By removing himself from the equation during the critical prep hours, Jason leaves Kylie to play zone defense against four children while simultaneously managing a complex timeline of oven temperatures and side dishes. It is a scenario that many mothers will recognize instantly, often referred to as the “invisible load” of parenting.

However, Jason’s willingness to call himself out—to label his behavior as “useless” and an “inconvenience”—is part of what makes the “New Heights” dynamic so compelling. He isn’t pretending to be a superhero super-dad; he is admitting to his flaws in a way that feels relatable and human. He knows he is gaming the system, and by sharing it with the world, he invites us all to laugh at the imperfect reality of family life.

Fasting, Feasting, and Waffle Fights

The podcast episode wasn’t just about turkey frying evasion. The brothers also delved into the lead-up to the big meal, revealing the extreme measures some take to prepare for the caloric onslaught. Jason shared that he and former defensive end Marcus Spears had agreed to do a fast before the holiday, a decision he immediately regretted.

“I’m about 36 hours in,” Jason groaned, describing how he felt after visiting Disney World and Wisconsin, where he “ate a bunch of freaking egg rolls” and “shoved a prime rib and an ice cream drink” down his face. The fast was meant to be a reset, a way to “unplug and plug it back in” before the Thanksgiving binge.

Travis, sounding skeptical, asked for clarification on what a fast actually entails. “You’re literally not eating?” he asked. “I’ve never entertained myself to know what fasting is.”

Jason’s description of his hunger—admitting that the mere smell of food was torturing him—adds another layer of comedy to the upcoming holiday. He predicts that by the time the fast breaks on Thanksgiving Day, he will be feral. “I might eat a whole turkey by myself by that point,” he joked.

The conversation also touched on the sheer difficulty of reasoning with toddlers when food is involved. In a segment that perfectly encapsulates the “threenager” phase (or in this case, a six-year-old), Jason recounted a recent “full fight” with his daughter Wyatt over a frozen waffle.

“The argument ruins about 30 minutes of our entire day because she wants a whole waffle and I’m trying to explain to her that there’s only four waffles and there’s like f-ing 15 people,” Jason recalled. It is these small, irrational battles that make the holiday season so exhausting for parents, further explaining why Jason might be eager to escape to the fryer for an hour of quiet.

A Tale of Two Thanksgivings

The episode also highlighted the stark contrast between the brothers’ current life stages. While Jason is navigating the domestic trenches of suburbia with a house full of children and in-laws, Travis is living the active NFL life. His Thanksgiving will be spent on the field, playing football, followed by a flight back to Kansas City.

“I’ll probably miss a Thanksgiving meal unless we win and I get some turkey on the field,” Travis noted.

This dichotomy is the heart of the show: the retired family man vs. the active superstar. Jason’s stories of domestic incompetence resonate because they represent the transition many fans are also going through—moving from the freedom of youth to the beautiful, messy responsibilities of adulthood.

The Turducken Conundrum

Adding to the culinary confusion, Jason mentioned that a “Turducken” is also on the menu this year, though he expressed zero confidence in how to prepare it. “No idea how to cook it,” he confessed, noting that you can’t fry it because of the stuffing inside. “I would assume it’s kind of too big to put in the fryer.”

This detail serves as the cherry on top of the chaotic sundae. Not only is there a traditional turkey, an unnecessary fried turkey, and a house full of guests, but now there is a complicated bird-within-a-bird-within-a-bird to contend with. It is a recipe for disaster, or at least for a very memorable story for next week’s podcast.

Conclusion

Jason Kelce’s “New Heights” confession is more than just a funny anecdote; it is a celebration of the messy, imperfect reality of family holidays. We love the Kelces not because they are polished and perfect, but because they are authentic. Jason’s admission that he hides from his responsibilities to fry a turkey is the kind of honest storytelling that builds a genuine connection with listeners.

As millions of Americans prepare to gather around their own tables, dealing with their own “useless” relatives and chaotic kitchens, they can take comfort in knowing that even in the home of a Super Bowl champion, things are just as crazy. Kylie Kelce may be the MVP of the household this Thursday, but Jason’s ability to laugh at his own fumble makes him a winner in the entertainment department. So, if you find your partner sneaking out the back door to check the grill for the tenth time this holiday, just remember: they are pulling a Jason Kelce.