WEAPONIZING THE DOJ: TRUMP’S LEGAL ATTACK DOG TRIES TO REWRITE HISTORY WITH A STACK OF PAPERWORK

Washington is holding its breath, watching one of the most brazen legal maneuvers in the history of the U.S. Department of Justice. Trump-world’s notorious legal attack dog, Pam Bondi, just attempted a stunt so shameless it would make a banana republic blush: she retroactively appointed the prosecutor who indicted James Comey—immediately after Comey pointed out that the original appointment was illegal.

Yes, you read that correctly. The current Attorney General apparently believes she can rewrite constitutional history with a signature and a stamp.

Comey Challenges: “This indictment is invalid—the prosecutor was not legally appointed.”

Bondi Retorts: “Nuh-uh! I just decided to go back in time and fix it. Checkmate!”

THIS ISN’T LAW, IT’S LEGAL COSPLAY

This is what happens when an administration runs the Department of Justice (DOJ) like a pool bar tab at Mar-a-Lago: sloppy, rushed, and held together by “Sharpie law” and good vibes.

Bondi literally filed an order declaring that she is “retroactively ratifying” the authority of prosecutor Lindsey Halligan dating back to September. The sole purpose of this move: to cover up the fact that Halligan apparently had absolutely no legal authority when she first brought the indictment.

Imagine being pulled over without a driver’s license and shouting: “No worries, Officer, I’ll print one tonight—retroactive to birth!”

This is not the action of a Justice Department. This is political theatre, a desperate attempt to legalize vengeance.

WEAPONIZING THE SYSTEM OR LEGAL BOOMERANG?

The entire saga began because a previous career U.S. attorney refused to indict Comey. When even the career professionals refused to play ball, Bondi immediately swapped in someone more loyal to the MAGA mission. When loyalty replaces justice, it ceases to be a legal system.

But here is the most delicious twist: Comey is playing chess, while Bondi is playing “Time-Travel Uno” with crayons. If this slapdash, “fix-it-later” stunt collapses in court—and it looks monumentally shaky—it could spectacularly blow up the indictment.

This is the price you pay when an administration tries to weaponize the DOJ but forgets one tiny detail: Due Process still exists.

Pam Bondi didn’t just stumble over the rule of law. She set it on fire, tried to scribble it back together, and called it “ratification.”

Spoiler Alert: Democracy doesn’t run on retroactive authorization memos. America deserves a Justice Department—not a political hit squad with a time-travel fantasy and a rubber stamp.

Stay tuned. This power grab just turned into a legal boomerang—and it’s already mid-arc.