“Travis Kelce LOSES IT On Shedeur Sanders in Hilarious Locker Room Roast – Teammates Left SPEECHLESS!”
In a moment that will go down as one of the most chaotic locker-room roasts never officially recorded, fictional insiders claim that Travis Kelce — yes, the legendary tight end and self-declared “CEO of Trash Talk” — unleashed a comedy-level verbal meltdown on Shedeur Sanders that left players frozen like statues.
According to this totally made-up report, the drama began when Shedeur walked into the facility wearing sunglasses, jewelry, and a camera crew — at least, that’s what the fake witnesses say. Kelce looked up, raised an eyebrow, and dropped the first bomb.
“Bro, this isn’t a Netflix special,” Kelce allegedly said. “You throwing passes, not filming a rap video.”
The locker room broke.
Shedeur tried to respond — sources say he started with, “I’m built for bright lights” — but Kelce reportedly cut him off again:
“Then how come every time you try to go deep, the ball needs a GPS tracker?”
Players fell out of their seats. Somebody claimed even the water cooler was shaking from laughter.
One imaginary rookie said, “I’ve never heard a man roasted so clean. No cursing. No insults. Just pure destruction.”
But the fake story doesn’t stop there.
THE ROAST CONTINUES
Witnesses (that absolutely do not exist) reported that Shedeur tried clapping back:
“You’re just mad I get more cameras than you.”
Kelce allegedly smirked, leaned forward, and whispered loud enough for everyone to hear:
“Buddy, I don’t need cameras — I have Super Bowl rings.”
Silence.
Shock.
Even the imaginary equipment manager had to sit down.
DEION SANDERS ENTERS THE CHAT (FICTIONALLY)
In this parody universe, the rumor claims Deion Sanders heard about the roast and FaceTimed the locker room within minutes.
Kelce answered the call.
Coach Prime reportedly said, “Travis, you better watch your mouth.”
Kelce laughed and replied, “Coach, I’m just preparing him. The NFL talks louder than I do.”
One fake witness swears Shedeur quietly put his sunglasses away after that.
THE AFTERMATH
Despite the imaginary roast, sources in this satire report say both players left laughing, shaking hands, and planning a 2-on-2 basketball game for charity. Kelce apparently told Shedeur:
“You’re gonna be fine, kid. But if you throw that wobbly pass again, I’m calling TSA to inspect it for turbulence.”
Legendary.
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